Shadows Dance

In the waking hours of the night when you’re all alone, time feels rather foreign to your mind.  You have no choice but stare above you at the shadows dancing on your ceiling. These shadows are created by the smallest cascades of light. Light that has forcibly found a way to peer through the already closed blinds, just to make a known presence to you when you least expect it.

 As you stare; curiosity lingers heavily, almost as if to find hope, the very emotion that has the ability to lend courage and empower the soul. Your focus changes in moments like these and allows deeper thoughts about specific aspects of your life. Why do you need this courage? Are there really aspects of you that need to be changed? This light becomes a battle across your mind, one that is being played out in creative patterns right above you!

In those hours; in that darkness you’re innately consumed with your darkest self. And as you watch insecurities and fears dance sporadically across the ceiling your focus changes again. Glancing back at the clock, an hour has gone by and you know that the rising sun brings with it expectations of a coming day. You try your best to reason with yourself to turn off the very thought that is lending you this feeling of unrest. It never works because when you’re in this position, laying here in the dark, you force yourself subconsciously to contemplate your very own existence. And that my friends can’t be turned off like the light switch on the wall.   

Truth is told in the darkest hours... My decisions are what keep me wrestling in the dark, my actions, my own expectations, my insecurities and my fears. Deep down I have an unfulfilled need that is longing to take over and heal itself. I know what is missing in my life. What’s left this hole inside of me and I know what is right there within my reach waiting for the day that I can say how I feel and not fear love any longer.  How long will I wait. What will being alone, here in the night offer me?

The answer is unknown at this point and in the waking hours of the night time feels rather foreign to your mind and truth is told in the darkest hours.